This morning I sat and read all the scripture pertaining to Palm Sunday. What happened all those centuries ago on this day. How Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a young colt and how the masses threw down their coats and yelled "Hosanna!" as they waved their palms. The people were proclaiming Jesus as their King. They were ready for Him to take over reign and save them from the oppression of the Roman Empire. There's so much significance here. So much we can unearth and dig into. The soil I dug into today was a little different than the typical Palm Sunday reverie.
Unless a piece of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone. But if it dies, it bears much fruit. - John 12:24
As soon as I read this line of scripture my eyes fixed on it as if there was something here. Something maybe that I could glean from this passage. I asked myself, 'What is my initial thought from this?'
Immediately I thought of the dream I woke up to this morning. It left me sad and to be honest, a little worn out. In my dream I was still together with my ex. I was sensing he was about to break up with me and so I tried everything I could to get him to stay. I wrote him a letter and I begged for time together with him. At one point I watched him write a letter and tape it to my door. Before I could get to it to open it up, I woke up. The symbolism doesn't escape me. I am fully aware now that I will never have the answers that I so desperately wanted. How the dream ends before I get those heartfelt words is not a coincidence. In fact, in all my dreams, I always wake up before I get to the 'point'.
Reading this passage really struck me. I felt God saying "Let go of the good, for the better." My past relationship was not bad. We never fought and I think our chemistry never really died. In so many ways I felt like this relationship was ideal. I have held onto that thought for so long, feeling like I really lost out on the best thing that might ever happen to me.
I know, I know... I can hear you saying not to put God in this small box. I know God is capable of providing more than I can think or imagine. Lately, things have been happening and in my heart I hear God say each time, "See, I always provide for you." In the most simple, mediocre ways - like getting the last parking spot in my lot. Yet, despite all these things for some reason I feel like when it comes to my future and the potential for a husband, it feels meek. Not because I don't think God can provide but because I see how lack I've been in this area in the past.
Needless to say, I heard God simply say to let go of that. To let him go and trust that God has something more fruitful for me. Yes a strand of wheat is good, but a whole plant will be so much more fulfilling. Without letting this piece of wheat fall to the ground to die, it remains alone. But if I let this relationship fall into the dust of the earth, from it much fruit will come. Fruit from the tears I've sowed. "Those who have sowed with tears will return with songs of joy." [Psalm 126:5] One broken little seed can sprout up a plant that grows, provides for, and fills far beyond measure. But I must let that seed be buried beneath the earth. Pushed into the dark cold soil. To be rained on for months.
I researched the symbolism of wheat in the bible. Turns out it represents love and charity. Furthermore, harvesting the wheat symbolises the advancing state of love and charity.
So to bury this seed in order to let it be harvested months after the rain has ended will grow in love and charity. It will produce much fruit, an abundance, a surplus, more than I had before and fruit that is good for the soul. It won't sprout up overnight but in it's due season.
It's hard to let go of something good in order to wait for something better. Waiting for a plant to develop is literally like watching grass grow. It feels slow and sometimes painful. In my mind I can still see myself in 3rd grade. We planted seeds and each morning would monitor for signs of growth. I feel like my plant was always the last to sprout.
Don't settle for the good when you can have the best. Keep waiting patiently on the Lord. Your seed will grow.
Let go of what is good and satisfying, allow it to fall into the hands of God and let Him fertilize it. He knows the perfect time and He's the ultimate creator of all things good. Your seed will sprout and from it will be a much greater joy. Your patient obedience will pay off in dividends.
Yes, I'm preaching to myself. I've been crying Hosanna for quite some time. I'm ready to drop these seeds down and see what will sprout up from it. Today while visiting grams in the nursing home I saw a couple walk in with giant palms. I asked grams if she saw it, she didn't. But immediately she said, "It's Palm Sunday? Did you go to church today?" I love that. I love that she can still remember who Jesus is and to honor Him even though she can't always remember much else. That's the benefit of allowing your seed to take roots. It grows down deep and bears much fruit for years to come.